Z Train Does anyone care about soccer? Probably not. But I do. And it's my blog. I’m a big Tottenham fan, which has finally started to pay off after a literal lifetime. The faith in youth (known in the Land of the Free as “The Process”) is being executed to perfection. Spurs have seen the likes of Alli, Dier, Kane, Winks, Rose and several others come to the club at a young age or come through the academy and make an impact on a global scale. It’s exciting to watch unfold, and fills you with a sense of pride for your club, or at least however much an American can feel about European sports. This post is going to talk about the opposite: who we need to target in the transfer market to compete with the likes of Chelsea and the likely resurgence of the other top European teams. Dropping our balls on Arsenal last year was every bit as good as I thought it would be, and this has to be the biggest motivation for us to keep going. God I hate Arsenal. The roster is tough to poke holes in, so I’m going to start with who we should move on from. Kyle Walker He’s got to be the one sure thing to leave this summer (check the petty British). I’ve flip flopped on my opinion of Walker throughout his career at the Lane. He’s a freak athlete, that part is undoubted. He’s always been streaky with where his head is at and with the final touch, but it’s something out of a movie watching him run up the right wing. Cashing in on Walker is the perfect move, and absolutely the time to do it. He’s obviously not happy with the pressure Trippier is putting on him, and with Kyle Walker-Peters ready to move into a real role, we can afford to move him on. There are talks of $65m+ which sounds way too good. See ya bud! Pocket that cash and use it elsewhere. Moussa Sissoko Jesus Christ. Whoever paid $45m for this guy is an idiot. After seeing him be horribly inconsistent and lackluster, 4 games in the Euro changes everyone’s minds. Not sure how many times a guy has a good international tournament and GM’s cum their pants, assured he can turn 4 good games into an entire season. He doesn’t make sense for the system we run, trapped between the number 10 and the holding midfield. He strangely has a decent market and we need to move on from him for any amount of money, he’s a cancer in the locker room Erik Lamela I was a total Lamela hater at first after his folly of errors his first year, but I genuinely love the guy now. He works so hard and has developed strength and quality to add to the effort and touch he’s always had. I just think it’s time to cash in and move on. Coming off a really strange injury, he hasn’t played in a year. He’s still got a market, and I just don’t think he’ll come back the same player after a year plus out. In order to compete at the top, wing is the glaring hole that we can improve at. I think cashing in on Lamela, trusting Onomah and Son for depth, and targeting a top level wing is the way to do it. Georges N’Koudou I never understand taking the little guys into the Premier League from other less physical leagues. It doesn’t really work. We’ve seen it with Cuadrado, Mohamed Salah, Jesus Navas. Whatever. Get this clown out of here, back to France where he can actually hang. Targets
Douglas Costa This guy is a stud. I really would want him over anyone else. He’s got quality at both feet, can play forward, the number 10 and either wing, and speed kills. If we could get him to contribute on the defensive end as well, he’s the perfect addition to this team. It seems like it could be realistic, he’s crowded out on the wings in Bayern, and we can afford him with all the money we keep generating. I’m a huge Douglas Costa guy, and he’s my pick for best available. Alexis Sanchez Hahahahahahahahahaahaha God I hate Arsenal. Doubt this would happen, but we could afford him and we’re a much more attractive side at the moment. He’d fit in on the right wing really well, and I’d be all about it. Yo, Lex, if you’re reading this which I know you are, just think about whether you want to keep winning the lame ass FA Cup no one outside of England cares about or challenge for the Champions League as part of a dynasty. Just saying. Cengiz Under I don’t know a damn thing about this dude, but how Tottenham would it be to pick up some random kid from Turkey when we’re challenging for a title. He’d probably turn out just like Dele Alli or Eric Dier. So I’m about it. Under is the over, hell yeah for awful puns. Matthias Ginter If he’s actually available, I hope this is lined up in case Eric Dier heads off (hoping he doesn't). He's an upgrade at least, and can play either full back, and excels at center back and can even play a holding midfield role. I like this guy a lot, and it's never bad to drink from the eternal fountain that is the young German talent that never seems to end. So no, I don't want to sell Rose, Dier or Janssen. I think Janssen deserves another shot, and Rose and Dier are key guys of the young core that I don't want to see leave unless it's for a huge profit. So there it is, soccer definitely is not rocket science.
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